Is love a fancy or a feeling?

The emotion named "love" has always put me in a quandary and I wasn't really sure why, until this morning.

I very rarely remember my dreams and am typically pea green with envy for those who do. It seems as though they can tell you about this amazing dream they had last night and somehow connect the dots on how it fits into their life. For me, this phenomenon happens once in a blue moon and I can never figure out how the dream actually ties into my existence. See, a secret to me, I don't get much unless you knock me over the head with it. I don't understand cryptic or subtle messages. Ask the men I have dated or married. They have to grab me and look me in the face and state that they like me or love me before I even get it.

Thankfully, this dream was direct. I woke up with the overwhelming feeling that I didn't know what love was. For a person, like myself, who takes things very literally, it's a hard concept to swallow.

You can't ever master love. You can't get a PhD in love and then know all about it. It's impossible. It's so funny, you master almost any other important subject, but the one thing that makes everything and is spoken of so readily, you can't ever master. Nope, I am sure there are people who are 100 years old who still scratch their heads and wonder about this phenomenon.

There are tons of books from so-called experts about love, but do they really know. I think in your heart of hearts, you know that they don't.

I saw a dear friend of mine today who I haven't seen in a while. She was glowing and before I knew it, she ran over to me and gave me a hug. She excitedly exclaimed, " He said it. He finally said it." She was beaming. Never mind the fact that they were on a cookout and she said, "I love marshmallow's," and he thought she said, "I love you." He thought she said it first. She's decided to let it lie.

My son went on three dates with someone and they have exchanged the love word. He told me he believes that when you feel it, you should say it. Should you and what exactly is it?

I know that ooey gooey feeling inside when you meet someone new. They like the same movies, the same food, the same music, and your heart is beating so fast. They said that twitterpated feeling you have at the beginning of a relationship can be more addicting then heroin. A natural high, but what goes beyond that?

There is the flip side of the old couple who have been married for forever and survived it all. Is that love? When you go through hell and back with a person, shoving those hurdles aside and just plowing through hand in hand.

Pseudo-psychologists say it has to do with mutual respect, but there are couples out there that tear each other apart with no respect at all, yet they still love one another.

At this point, I thought I had love all figured out. That ooey gooey feeling can last if both persons are willing to work on it. That you hold hands and drive right through the hurdles, but that is wrong too.

I know the love I have for my son, but men can't compare to that level of feeling because it's different.

Isn't it?