Anywho, my day wasn't as exciting as yesterdays. No hot married construction guys coming in so I could massage their hairy faces. But, as I'm in the check out line at Walgreen's buying my toiletries, I notice this:
The married contractor reminded me a little of him with that Irish/German...uh, that white guy look.
When I got home, I finally ran into the nosy neighbors ("The Looky-Loo's") I have been avoiding. You know the ones that have their shades slightly open all the time so they don't miss any suburban excitement. Well, this time I saw them coming and I leaned into it. I know they knew all the gossip on my ex's side but it was my duty to inform them of the truth in my subtle and nonchalant way.
I told the ultra-Christian Looky-Loo's that my husband is with a girl that is 19 and they looked horrified. I went on to explain everything, but now I've got the speech encapsulated and in Reader's Digest form for easy retrieval at any time. I toss them all the info and leave knowing that they hunger for more.
Unfortunately, after I got back from my Walgreen's trip, I saw an invitation to a 4th of July block party stuck on my door. Oh, those Looky-Loo's are so friggin good when they want information!
I must get out of town. Slosha invited me to one of her soirees and I'm sure, just because it's her, there will be booze.
You know how your Mom would make you cookies or hot cocoa when you got hurt? When you grow up and you're getting a divorce, women give you wine and there is no one better a that, then Slosh.
So I say thank you Lord, you saved me again and thank you Slosha for making me drink through this entire process.
I do feel better. I just want my thighs to be thinner.
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